Cheesy, I have NO IDEA how you do it....

[2LZ]

....and that's fly so damn often.

Just got back from our Jacksonville trip on Tuesday. Spent almost a week there. First, I haven't flown in over 25 years. Yes, much has changed. I was amazed at how quickly the TSA herded the masses through, at least that was our experience. That was the positive.

Two things I noticed this time around:

1- Airports are WAY too big now. Look man, it's a freaking bus terminal, not a mall. 45 minutes between flights barely gives you time to run to your next gate. I have a bum foot and a iffy-ticker. Hobbling along huffing and puffing, limping through the terminal while carrying my carry-on bags is insanity.....and NO, I'm NOT going to get a freaking wheelchair!
I like how they systematically place the massive shopping malls between the gate and the baggage pick-up. Bastards.......

2- I find nothing romantic or exciting about flying. Flying has one advantage. It's faster than by car or rail, period. The rest of it SUCKS! It's a freaking bus with wings instead of wheels, that's all. The biggest difference? Every bus I've been on is much more comfortable, provides far more travel room, and wider, more cushy seating. These planes are so damn cramped, I threw my back out trying to get into my first seat on the flight out! Am I too fat? Yep....but not obese! I'm 6', 235. These cabins are designed for the Mighty Midgets wrestling troop!

Another thing! How come the schmuck in the middle seat gets both the armrests!? If my left elbow gets hit by the drink cart one more time, I'm gonna start drooling and have involuntary twitches! "Watch your elbows!" They'd say while wheeling by. I AM watching my elbow! It's jammed in my belly button, and my head is shoved so far up my arse because of these cramped seats, I have a clear view of it!

2- The entire airport experience is confusing, at best. Signs and arrows everywhere to attempt to point you in the correct direction so you don't miss the connecting flight. I only took one wrong escalator, which was a "fail" on my part....but still not too bad for the amount of snap direction decisions I had to make.

Long story short, I spent a week being told what to do by everyone and everything. Being told what to do by airport robots over speakers, being told what to do by airport signs, being told what to do by Siri in the car (don't get me started on getting lost in Jacksonville), being told what to do by the hotel desk clerk (apparently I wasn't using the waffle maker correctly), being told what to do by my mother, and sister-in-law, and finally, being told what to do by my wife. At least she told me she still loved me.

Thank God for beer........ You're a brave man, cheesy.

[cheesy]

Originally Posted by 2LZ

....and that's fly so damn often.

Just got back from our Jacksonville trip on Tuesday. Spent almost a week there. First, I haven't flown in over 25 years. Yes, much has changed. I was amazed at how quickly the TSA herded the masses through, at least that was our experience. That was the positive.

Two things I noticed this time around:

1- Airports are WAY too big now. Look man, it's a freaking bus terminal, not a mall. 45 minutes between flights barely gives you time to run to your next gate. I have a bum foot and a iffy-ticker. Hobbling along huffing and puffing, limping through the terminal while carrying my carry-on bags is insanity.....and NO, I'm NOT going to get a freaking wheelchair!
I like how they systematically place the massive shopping malls between the gate and the baggage pick-up. Bastards.......

2- I find nothing romantic or exciting about flying. Flying has one advantage. It's faster than by car or rail, period. The rest of it SUCKS! It's a freaking bus with wings instead of wheels, that's all. The biggest difference? Every bus I've been on is much more comfortable, provides far more travel room, and wider, more cushy seating. These planes are so damn cramped, I threw my back out trying to get into my first seat on the flight out! Am I too fat? Yep....but not obese! I'm 6', 235. These cabins are designed for the Mighty Midgets wrestling troop!

Another thing! How come the schmuck in the middle seat gets both the armrests!? If my left elbow gets hit by the drink cart one more time, I'm gonna start drooling and have involuntary twitches! "Watch your elbows!" They'd say while wheeling by. I AM watching my elbow! It's jammed in my belly button, and my head is shoved so far up my arse because of these cramped seats, I have a clear view of it!

2- The entire airport experience is confusing, at best. Signs and arrows everywhere to attempt to point you in the correct direction so you don't miss the connecting flight. I only took one wrong escalator, which was a "fail" on my part....but still not too bad for the amount of snap direction decisions I had to make.

Long story short, I spent a week being told what to do by everyone and everything. Being told what to do by airport robots over speakers, being told what to do by airport signs, being told what to do by Siri in the car (don't get me started on getting lost in Jacksonville), being told what to do by the hotel desk clerk (apparently I wasn't using the waffle maker correctly), being told what to do by my mother, and sister-in-law, and finally, being told what to do by my wife. At least she told me she still loved me.

Thank God for beer........ You're a brave man, cheesy.

I’m glad you survived.
It’s just part of my job. Before I started this gig, I flew twice between 1976 and 1997. Once to Nassau and once to Paris(the one with the big tower). It was a learning curve after 1997. It got a bit weird after 9/11. Me and the TSA didn’t always get along. Once I got Global Entry, that also nets you TSA Pre-Check, there was an attitude change from the TSA drones. One of the best things my employer did was to allow us to make our own reservations. When we had an office manager doing it, she always booked the cheapest and most inconvenient itineraries she could find. 10 hour flight from Chicago to Portland, OR with five stops and three plane changes. A flight to Jo-burg, South Africa that had a 17 hour layover in Madrid because it was $25 cheaper than a 5 hour layover in London. The straw that broke the camels back was a trip to Australia. She was told to have me overnight in Sydney, then fly to Perth the next day. Dingbat booked Chicago, to LA(4.5 hrs)to Sydney(14 hrs)to Perth(4hrs). Almost wish it went that way. Fog closed Sydney, so we diverted to Brisbane and sat on the runway for 3 hours while waiting for the fog to clear and to refuel. Missed my flight out of Sydney and sat for 3 hours for the next one. Long damn day.
Once I started making my own plans, things got easier. I know which shopping malls/bus stations to avoid. I avoid the aisle seats for the reasons you listed. The wall by the window seat is a good place to nap. Having an empty middle seat is like getting extra peanuts in a box of Cracker Jacks. Being a frequent flyer has its perks. Since I no longer have to travel with tools, it’s carry on only. Being a frequent flyer means I board early and always have a place for my bag. I’ve had a lot of first class upgrades this year, too. First class ain’t what it used to be, though. Used to be treated like royalty, now you’re just treated a bit better than the rest of the bus. But you still get free booze.
If I have to do a connecting flight, I try to book it with at least a 2 hr layover, just in case my first flight is delayed. And sometimes, that isn’t enough.

You just gotta role with the punches.

[wheelbender6]

To me, a passenger plane is just a more expensive bus. There is not a lot to enjoy about it. It's just a means to an end.

[2LZ]

Originally Posted by wheelbender6

To me, a passenger plane is just a more expensive bus. There is not a lot to enjoy about it. It's just a means to an end.

....and to top it all off, got home Tuesday. Started feeling crappy Wednesday evening. Couch-bound on Thursday. Tested positive for Covid Friday. Awesomeness......

[wheelbender6]

Sorry you got Covid.
Looks like we may be required to mask up on commercial flights soon.

[2LZ]

Originally Posted by wheelbender6

Sorry you got Covid.
Looks like we may be required to mask up on commercial flights soon.

Could have gotten it anywhere, really. Hotels, restaurants, Daytona tour, wedding and reception. Tons of family I haven't seen in years, hand shakes and hugs. It was a loaded trip in five days. I'm fully vaxxed (though I'm due for a booster), and have also had it already, but I'm one of those "immune-compromised" folks they talk about. Fortunately, when I do get it, it's only a couple days of cold-like symptoms. I should listen to my late grandma. "Warmed whiskey and a bit of honey will sooth your throat." ;-)

[Bob Kelly]

2LZ ! I hear your pain ! Never been on a big passenger plane.... only a Cestna 172
people,crouds bodies and me do NOT mix well !
Your grandma was right a Shot or 2 of whisky (enough to get you tipsy) will work on me every time I start feeling like Doo Doo ! it'll knock a cold or flu better than anything I have found..... bugs can't multiply in ya with Alcohol in your system !
these doctors now days could learn alot from grandmas ! but instead they are after money.... i have no faith in them any more Alcohol has it's place ...and killing the common cold is one of them !
....
Bob....

[cheesy]

‘member when I wrote that I book at least two hours between connecting flights. Good thing I did. Flight from Cancun was forty minutes late getting into Miami. Lots of people with tight connections in panic mode. Me, I sat at a bar, had fish tacos and a couple virus beers. Flight to Chicago was also delayed. More panic from those with tight connections. As O’hare is where I get off, my main worries are, I really have to pee, how long will I have to wait for the damn shuttle bus to the G parking lot, and will the deli I stop at on the way home be open. It was NO to that last one.

[cheesy]

2LZ-A little story about my one and only trip to Jacksonville. Jacksonville is the headquarters of CSXT, otherwise known as CSX, one of the Class 1 rail outfits in the US. Per CSX, if we wanted to sell something to them, we had to have a couple of people on our staff qualified to teach their Safety Class to our personnel. Myself and Jason got the nod for that circus. The fact that Jason or I would be the personnel we were supposed to train didn't seem to matter.

Back then, I was spending a fair amount of time in Salt Lake City and bunking in a Hyatt Place near that jobsite. Nice rooms, decent food for a hotel, and the front staff were all very cute girls.

So, Jason and I make plans to fly to Jacksonville. I suggest we stay at the Hyatt Place because it's close to where we have to get our training and cute girls. No direct flights on American from Chicago so we fly to Melbourne to connect to Daytona. Rent a car there and drive to Jacksonville.

So I'm building up the cute staff at the Hyatt Place to Jason on the drive to Jacksonville. We check in at the Hyatt Place and the entire front staff is...dudes. Wearing ascots. Jason looks at the dudes, then looks at me and just says you're buying. All. Night. Long. And Jason can put away the beer.

[Falkon45]

lol. Man, Jacksonville has become a strange place over the last few years. Typically, the Florida Man stories are out of Duval County, or something close to Miami.

[cheesy]

Originally Posted by Falkon45

lol. Man, Jacksonville has become a strange place over the last few years. Typically, the Florida Man stories are out of Duval County, or something close to Miami.

Which is why I am a Carl Hiaasen fan.

[Boatguy]

Originally Posted by Falkon45

lol. Man, Jacksonville has become a strange place over the last few years. Typically, the Florida Man stories are out of Duval County, or something close to Miami.

Become? Lol.

I don’t think it has changed much. Over decades now it’s been the most crime riddled part of all of Florida. That includes theft and murder. It’s a rough place.

I’ve had more things stolen from me and Jacksonville that I can even list. And I will list them if anyone is interested.

And a lot of people get shot there. Or stabbed.

[Falkon45]

Originally Posted by Boatguy

Become? Lol.

I don’t think it has changed much. Over decades now it’s been the most crime riddled part of all of Florida. That includes theft and murder. It’s a rough place.

I’ve had more things stolen from me and Jacksonville that I can even list. And I will list them if anyone is interested.

And a lot of people get shot there. Or stabbed.

There was a story where a man shot a "lady of the night", after she serviced him, and asked for $5 and a bag of chips.

https://www.firstcoastnews.com/artic...3-cee457d9159f

Man, I have friends who live down there... but I dont visit much

[2LZ]

Funny thing.... Coming from a guy who used to live in Sacramento, Jacksonville, even wandering at night, was a cake walk.

[cheesy]

I survived the four flights through three different airports with Mrs. C over the weekend. We manage decent seats with leg room on all the flights. She stated that I have spent too much time at O'hare because I know where the best and least crowded bathrooms are in the AA terminal. So, she now has four flights this year and I have thirty nine more than she does.

On a side note, something I just noticed last night after getting back home late from seeing a customer in S. Illannoy. I'm having a snack and I notice a couple of guitar lesson books on the coffee table. I asked Mrs. C about them and she said they must be mine. "Huh, what? Mine? I don't have a guitar." She told me to look over by the book case. Until Monday afternoon, I guess, I didn't have a guitar. My daughter gifted me her acoustic classical when she dropped Buster Dog off on Monday and I never noticed until last night. Learning guitar was one of the 'to do' things on my retirement list.