Cheesy, I have NO IDEA how you do it....

2LZ · 10-20-2022, 01:13 PM

....and that's fly so damn often.

Just got back from our Jacksonville trip on Tuesday. Spent almost a week there. First, I haven't flown in over 25 years. Yes, much has changed. I was amazed at how quickly the TSA herded the masses through, at least that was our experience. That was the positive.

Two things I noticed this time around:

1- Airports are WAY too big now. Look man, it's a freaking bus terminal, not a mall. 45 minutes between flights barely gives you time to run to your next gate. I have a bum foot and a iffy-ticker. Hobbling along huffing and puffing, limping through the terminal while carrying my carry-on bags is insanity.....and NO, I'm NOT going to get a freaking wheelchair!
I like how they systematically place the massive shopping malls between the gate and the baggage pick-up. Bastards.......

2- I find nothing romantic or exciting about flying. Flying has one advantage. It's faster than by car or rail, period. The rest of it SUCKS! It's a freaking bus with wings instead of wheels, that's all. The biggest difference? Every bus I've been on is much more comfortable, provides far more travel room, and wider, more cushy seating. These planes are so damn cramped, I threw my back out trying to get into my first seat on the flight out! Am I too fat? Yep....but not obese! I'm 6', 235. These cabins are designed for the Mighty Midgets wrestling troop!

Another thing! How come the schmuck in the middle seat gets both the armrests!? If my left elbow gets hit by the drink cart one more time, I'm gonna start drooling and have involuntary twitches! "Watch your elbows!" They'd say while wheeling by. I AM watching my elbow! It's jammed in my belly button, and my head is shoved so far up my arse because of these cramped seats, I have a clear view of it!

2- The entire airport experience is confusing, at best. Signs and arrows everywhere to attempt to point you in the correct direction so you don't miss the connecting flight. I only took one wrong escalator, which was a "fail" on my part....but still not too bad for the amount of snap direction decisions I had to make.

Long story short, I spent a week being told what to do by everyone and everything. Being told what to do by airport robots over speakers, being told what to do by airport signs, being told what to do by Siri in the car (don't get me started on getting lost in Jacksonville), being told what to do by the hotel desk clerk (apparently I wasn't using the waffle maker correctly), being told what to do by my mother, and sister-in-law, and finally, being told what to do by my wife. At least she told me she still loved me.

Thank God for beer........ You're a brave man, cheesy.

10-20-2022, 01:13 PM	#1
2LZ Join Date: Mar 2010 Location: Volcano, Ca Posts: 7,112	Cheesy, I have NO IDEA how you do it.... ....and that's fly so damn often. Just got back from our Jacksonville trip on Tuesday. Spent almost a week there. First, I haven't flown in over 25 years. Yes, much has changed. I was amazed at how quickly the TSA herded the masses through, at least that was our experience. That was the positive. Two things I noticed this time around: 1- Airports are WAY too big now. Look man, it's a freaking bus terminal, not a mall. 45 minutes between flights barely gives you time to run to your next gate. I have a bum foot and a iffy-ticker. Hobbling along huffing and puffing, limping through the terminal while carrying my carry-on bags is insanity.....and NO, I'm NOT going to get a freaking wheelchair! I like how they systematically place the massive shopping malls between the gate and the baggage pick-up. Bastards....... 2- I find nothing romantic or exciting about flying. Flying has one advantage. It's faster than by car or rail, period. The rest of it SUCKS! It's a freaking bus with wings instead of wheels, that's all. The biggest difference? Every bus I've been on is much more comfortable, provides far more travel room, and wider, more cushy seating. These planes are so damn cramped, I threw my back out trying to get into my first seat on the flight out! Am I too fat? Yep....but not obese! I'm 6', 235. These cabins are designed for the Mighty Midgets wrestling troop! Another thing! How come the schmuck in the middle seat gets both the armrests!? If my left elbow gets hit by the drink cart one more time, I'm gonna start drooling and have involuntary twitches! "Watch your elbows!" They'd say while wheeling by. I AM watching my elbow! It's jammed in my belly button, and my head is shoved so far up my arse because of these cramped seats, I have a clear view of it! 2- The entire airport experience is confusing, at best. Signs and arrows everywhere to attempt to point you in the correct direction so you don't miss the connecting flight. I only took one wrong escalator, which was a "fail" on my part....but still not too bad for the amount of snap direction decisions I had to make. Long story short, I spent a week being told what to do by everyone and everything. Being told what to do by airport robots over speakers, being told what to do by airport signs, being told what to do by Siri in the car (don't get me started on getting lost in Jacksonville), being told what to do by the hotel desk clerk (apparently I wasn't using the waffle maker correctly), being told what to do by my mother, and sister-in-law, and finally, being told what to do by my wife. At least she told me she still loved me. Thank God for beer........ You're a brave man, cheesy. __________________ "Light a fire for a man, and you heat him for a day. Light a man on fire, and you heat him for the rest of his life." 2007 Suzuki DRZ400S (SM convert) 2009 Q Link XP 200 1967 BSA B25 250cc Starfire 2022 Royal Enfield Interceptor 650 2023 Royal Enfield Scram 411 1948 Royal Enfield Model G 350
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